Recently, I came across a humorous yet thought-provoking video on WhatsApp. It was presented as comedy, but the hidden message highlighted a serious concern of our society. In the video, a lady had opened a shop with a banner behind her that read – “Relatives available on rent here.” A couple, whose son was to get married, needed relatives to make their ceremony successful, but they had none of their own. In this shop, all kinds of relatives were available – uncles, aunts, cousins – each with their own rates.
At first glance, this scene evokes laughter, but on deeper reflection, it mirrors the changing reality of our family structure. Once upon a time, joint families were the strength of Indian society. Families weren’t just about parents and children, but also included grandparents, uncles, aunts, and cousins. These relationships were the real wealth of families. But over time, as we adopted the idea of “Hum Do, Hamare Do” (we two, our two), families began to shrink.
Today, children often don’t even know who aunts (masi/bua) or uncles (mausa/phupha) are, simply because they don’t see them at home. The tradition of cousins gathering together is vanishing. For the next generation, these relations might survive only in books or films.
The reasons for this are many, but lifestyle and changing mindsets are key. Young people today prefer marrying late. In the race for career and financial stability, marriage often gets postponed beyond the age of thirty. Even after marriage, having children is often delayed or avoided. The common thought is – “One child is enough, and if none, that’s fine too.”
Several factors contribute to this:
- Job-centric mindset – In earlier times, families were engaged in agriculture or business, where larger families were an asset. Today, most people depend on jobs where time and opportunities are limited, making large families impractical.
- Education and financial burden – Modern education has become extremely expensive. Raising even one child consumes a significant portion of the parents’ income. A second child feels like an economic risk.
- Impact on health – Delayed marriages and postponing parenthood have led to increased health issues. Fertility problems are now common even among the young. This is one reason why serious illnesses are also appearing at an earlier age.
As a result, families are not just smaller, but emotionally weaker too. The warmth of relationships, the power of togetherness, and the support of kinship are fading away. Earlier, during weddings, festivals, or times of crisis, the entire family stood together. Today, in many homes, responsibilities are confined to just husband, wife, and children. Elderly parents often feel lonely, as the once-bustling households have turned quiet.
But what can be the solution? Can we change this trend?
Sociologists and thinkers suggest that we must rediscover the importance of family. Joint families may be difficult in the modern era, but at least we should keep relationships alive. Children must be taught that relationships are not only of blood, but also of emotion and affection. Small gestures – visiting relatives during festivals, listening to stories from grandparents, including everyone in family functions – can make a big difference.
At the same time, government and society also have a role to play. If the burden of education and healthcare is reduced, people may feel more secure in expanding their families. Religious and social organizations can spread awareness about the sanctity of marriage and family. Media too has the responsibility to present family values not as a burden or joke, but as the foundation of life.
For senior citizens, this shrinking family structure is a special concern. They are the generation who experienced the beauty of large families. Today, as they find themselves increasingly isolated even among their children and grandchildren, it brings them deep pain. Thus, this issue is not only sociological or economic, but also one of human sensitivity.
If we fail to act in time, the day is not far when the comedy video about renting relatives may turn into a reality. Future generations may grow up deprived of family values, and the social structure may become even weaker. Therefore, the need of the hour is to revive the importance of family and strengthen the ties of relationships. That is, and always will be, the greatest wealth of our society.
Author
The author is the founder of the Never Say Retire mission. In order to achieve this goal, he also runs this website and his Facebook group Never Say Retire Forum has Hundreds and Thousands of members today.
